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ABOUT US
Our background comes from E Commerce and Pharmaceuticals. The area we are located has long been engaged in pharmaceutical research and new drug development. Most of our lab equipment was acquired from a large pharmaceutical company.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
Are you worried about the long-term impact of a poor diet on your health? Do you walk around feeling exhausted most of the time? Are you stressed? Do you have difficulty sleeping? Would you like to be exercising regularly but haven’t managed to work it into your busy schedule? You’re not alone…
While conventional medicine wants you to think that disease is a matter of chance, the reality is that disease (or a lack thereof) is almost entirely under your control. If you wish to be healthy, there are certain things you can do that reliably and consistently produce a healthy outcome
Top 5 Cancer Prevention Strategies
In this article, I want to share with you my top five strategies for optimal health, specifically as it relates to fighting cancer or cancer prevention.
#1 – Diet is Primary
Starting on an alternative cancer treatment protocol is like putting wood into the fireplace (i.e. your body). Once that wood catches fire and starts burning, the fire is going to kill the cancer cells that have colonized in your fireplace. However, eating a poor diet is like pouring water on that same fire; a bad diet will destroy many alternative cancer treatments. In fact, many scientific studies have shown that a poor diet alone can cause cancer.
All too often people think they are cured of cancer when the tumor is gone or when the cancer cells are dead. They then revert to their old ways of life, their old diet, their old vices, and sadly, the cancer returns. What we must remember is that some internal condition allowed the cancer to grow initially and if that internal condition returns, due to poor diet, then the cancer will also return.
How do we keep our internal environment healthy? Eat organic whole foods. Avoid genetically modified foods (GMOs). Stay away from processed foods.
#2 – Detoxification is Critical
In reality, detoxification is probably the most important yet overlooked part of an overall health plan and is critical for cancer prevention.
Detoxification is the process of neutralizing, transforming and eliminating toxins from the body and clearing excess mucus and congestion. A poor diet, poor digestion, a sluggish colon, reduced function in the liver, and poor elimination from the kidneys all lead to increased toxicity.
What is the process of detoxification? First, cleanse the colon, then rid your body of parasites, then cleanse the kidneys, liver and gall bladder, the blood and the remaining organs. This may be best order to follow.
Detoxification is an essential part of overall health and it is a crucial part of the cancer-fighting regimen. Did you know that God has given us a natural system to assist us with internal detox? This leads me to my next strategy, which is a specific exercise similar to jumping on the trampoline… it’s called rebounding.
#3 – Exercise is Essential
Research has led many scientists to conclude that jumping on a mini-trampoline (i.e. rebounding) is possibly the most effective exercise devised by man, especially because of the effect rebounding has on the lymph system.
The human body needs to move. The lymph system bathes every cell and carries nutrients to them while removing toxins such as dead and cancerous cells, heavy metals, infectious viruses, and other assorted wastes. But unlike the blood (which is pumped by the heart), the lymph is totally dependent on physical exercise.
Without adequate movement, the cells are left stewing in their own waste products and starving for nutrients, a situation which contributes to cancer and other degenerative diseases − as well as premature aging. Rebounding has been shown to increase lymph flow by up to 30 times! Also, all of the body’s cells become stronger in response to the increased “G forces” during rebounding, and this cellular exercise results in the self-propelled immune cells being up to 5 times more active!
Rebounding on a mini-trampoline directly strengthens the immune system, increases lymph flow, and oxygenates the blood. In my opinion, it is the best exercise to prevent and fight cancer.
Exercise also causes the body to sweat, and sweating is essential in the detoxification process. In addition to exercising, I sit in a sauna nightly to make sure that I’m sweating out toxins every day.
#4 – Get Some Sun
Vitamin D is automatically produced when the cholesterol in your skin absorbs the ultraviolet B (UVB) rays from the sun. It then circulates throughout your body to prevent cancer (and other diseases). It’s interesting to note that your body automatically produces just the right amount of vitamin D. So, if you get more sunlight than you need, you cannot overdose on vitamin D. Your skin will produce only what’s needed, and no more. (You do need to be careful about burning in the sun as too much exposure can create a problem.)
Researchers in Belgium appear to be the first to show that vitamin D lowers C-reactive protein (CRP), a measure of systemic inflammation. In critically ill patients. CRP is elevated when there is inflammation, and chronic inflammation is a risk factor for a number of conditions including coronary heart disease, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, and cancer.
Don’t fall for the “sunscreen myth.” The idea that sunscreen prevents cancer is a myth promoted by a greedy “tag-team” effort between the “cancer industry” and the sunscreen industry.
Sunlight is actually good for you (especially the UVB rays), and sunscreens filter out UVB! The main chemical used in sunscreens to filter out UVB is octyl methoxycinnamate (aka “OMC”) which has been shown to kill mouse cells even at low doses. Plus, it was shown to be particularly toxic when exposed to sunshine. And guess what? OMC is present in about 90% of sunscreens!
#5 – Sleep is Vital
No matter how well you eat, how often you exercise, and how much time you spend planning and cooking your meals, you can never be truly healthy if you don’t get enough quality sleep.
Lack of sleep can alter your metabolism, making you prone to weight gain, diabetes, heart disease, and cancer. It can dampen your immune response, leaving you susceptible to colds and flu. Not getting enough sleep can make you feel so overwhelmed and exhausted that you stop making good choices and end up doing what is easiest at the time.
You spend 1/3 of your life in your bedroom, so you need to make sure that it’s conducive to rest and relaxation. At night, turn off the Wi-Fi in your house and make sure that the electronics are not too close to your bed, due to the damaging effects of EMF (electromagnetic frequencies).
Try to also avoid things that keep you awake (like coffee and sodas). Of course there are many more reasons to avoid sodas (especially diet sodas), but drinking these beverages before bed can keep you awake due to the caffein AND don’t eat a large meal before bed. A big meal at night can rev up your metabolism and make it difficult to wind down. Also, our internal clocks (circadian rhythm) work best when we stick to a predictable schedule. Try to go to bed around the same time every night and awaken at roughly the same time every morning.
The Truth about Cancer visit HERE. As good as it may taste, sugar is NOT your friend. It may “feel” like your friend when it comforts you (due to the beta-endorphin rush in your brain), but sugar is really your ENEMY.
Truth be told, regular consumption of sugary foods is one of the worst things that you can do for your health. Modern scientific research has shown us, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that sugar in your food (in all its myriad forms) is taking a devastating toll on your health. We’ll explore cancer and sugar further down, but let’s first take a look at the sugar consumption trends over the past 300 years:
-In 1700, the average person consumed about 4 pounds of sugar per year.
-In 1800, the average person consumed about 18 pounds of sugar per year.
-In 1900, individual consumption had risen to 90 pounds of sugar per year.
-In 2012, more than 50% of all Americans consumed 1/2 pound of sugar per day — translating to a whopping 180 pounds of sugar per year!
-In 1890, only 3 people out of 100,000 had diabetes. In 2012, almost 8,000 out of every 100,000 people was diagnosed with diabetes (and this number is rising all the time)!
Creating Our Addiction to Sugar
The “sugar rush” has been targeted at our children. American children are consuming about 10 times as much sugar as they were in 1900, especially in the form of high fructose corn syrup (HFCS), which is the average American’s greatest source of calories! Highly addictive HFCS contains fructose and glucose, but they are NOT bound together (as they are in table sugar) so the body doesn’t need to break it down. Therefore, the fructose is absorbed immediately, going straight to the liver, which turns it into fat (VLDL and triglycerides).
According to Dr. Joseph Mercola:
“Fructose also tricks the body into gaining weight by fooling your metabolism (it turns off the appetite-control system). Fructose does not appropriately stimulate insulin, which in turn does not suppress ghrelin (the “hunger hormone”) and doesn’t stimulate leptin (the “satiety hormone”), which together result in your eating more and developing insulin resistance.” This process also suppresses the immune system.
But just because you avoid HFCS doesn’t mean that you’re in the clear. Excess intake of ALL processed sugars results in compromised immune function (decreasing the white blood cells’ ability to destroy bacteria), obesity, and diabetes.
And if that’s not enough, keep in mind that sugar is HIGHLY addictive! That’s right! Dr. Serge Ahmed of Bordeaux, France, has been working with rats and giving them the choice between cocaine and sugar. Guess which one wins, time and again?
That’s right… sugar!
It turns out that the sweet taste of sugar is more rewarding than the high of cocaine.
You see, sugar produces dopamine − a happy, feel-good chemical − in the brain. People get addicted to eating sugar, whereby they need it to feel “normal” and they undergo “withdrawal” if they cut sugar from their diets. If they go “cold turkey” for a few days, their brain will begin to produce dopamine on its own, but the discomfort of the withdrawal process keeps many “sugar addicts” trapped in their addiction.
Does Sugar Feed Cancer? Exploring the Sugar and Cancer Connection
Due to the anaerobic respiratory mechanism exhibited by ALL cancer cells, sugar is cancer’s favorite food! What this means is that cancer feeds on sugar. And since half of the white sugar in the USA comes from sugar beets, you should remember that most beets are now genetically modified with all the associated risks of GMOs. This is another reason to keep the “White Death” out of your diet and reduce your risk of various cancers, isn’t it?
Whether you are currently healing from a type of cancer such as breast cancer or prostate cancer, or are simply trying to maintain good dietary principles, I personally recommend that you avoid white sugar, brown sugar, agave, and all artificial sweeteners such as aspartame/AminoSweet, sucralose, and saccharin. If you have a sweet tooth, it’s best to stick with 100% organic green stevia, xylitol, raw honey, pure maple syrup, molasses, and coconut sugar.
The bottom line… if you want to be and stay healthy, you MUST take control of your sugar intake so that it doesn’t take control over you and your health!
Ending the Sugar Confusion
It’s easy to become confused by the various sugars and sweeteners, so here is a basic overview:
-Saccharide = sugar
-Glucose (aka “dextrose” or “grape sugar”), galactose (“milk sugar”), and fructose (“fruit sugar”) are all “monosaccharides” (i.e. single sugar molecules), known as “simple sugars.” The primary difference between them is the way your body metabolizes them.
-Glucose is a form of energy you were designed to run on. Every cell in your body uses glucose for energy.
-High amounts of fructose are very damaging to the body if it isn’t burned immediately for energy because it travels directly to the liver where it’s converted to triglycerides (fats). Excess triglycerides increase insulin resistance (and insulin production), thus contributing to diabetes in a “back door” fashion.
-The simple sugars can combine to form more complex sugars, like sucrose (“table sugar”) which is a “disaccharide” comprised of 50% glucose and 50% fructose.
-“Refined” white sugar (pure sucrose) is washed with a syrup solution, then with hot water, clarified (usually chemically) to remove impurities, decolorized, concentrated, evaporated, re-boiled until crystals form, centrifuged again to separate, then dried. By this point, any remnants of “natural goodness” and “nutritional value” have completely disappeared! Quite frankly, white sugar should be considered an “industrial product” rather than “food.”
-“Brown sugar” is white sugar mixed with molasses.
-“Raw” sugar is not really raw. It has been cooked, and most of the minerals and vitamins are gone. But it’s probably a little better than refined white sugar because it has a little of the molasses remaining.
-Aspartame or AminoSweet is a neurotoxic rat poison… need I say more?
-Splenda (sucralose) is NOT a sugar, despite its deceptive marketing slogan, “made from sugar.” It’s a chlorinated artificial sweetener in line with aspartame.
-Honey is approximately 50% fructose, but in natural (raw and unpasteurized) form contains many health benefits. Buying honey that is local and unpasteurized is best.
-Stevia is an extremely sweet herb derived from the leaf of the South American stevia plant, which is completely safe (in its natural form). Green stevia is the whole plant, while white stevia is processed and can often contain other ingredients like natural flavors or dextrose − a form of sugar. 100% organic green stevia in its natural state is what you want.
-Agave nectar is made from the agave plant, which is a cactus. Sounds natural, right? Like maple syrup from a tree, or honey from a beehive. Only it isn’t. Agave is HIGHLY processed while the end product does not even remotely resemble the original agave plant. Furthermore, agave is approximately 80% fructose (much higher than honey and maple syrup).
-HFCS (high fructose corn syrup) is 55% fructose and 45% glucose. It is mostly genetically modified. Stay away!
-Rapadura is the pure juice extracted from the sugar cane (using a press), which is then evaporated over low heat, whilst being stirred with paddles, then sieve ground to produce a grainy sugar. It has not been cooked at high heats or spun to change it into crystals, and the molasses is maintained in the sugar. “Sucanat” is the USA trade name for Rapadura.
-Coconut sugar is made from the sweet watery sap that drips from the cut flower buds of the coconut palm. It has a low glycemic index (GI) and is rich in amino acids. It is typically less than 10% fructose, with sucrose being the primary component.
-Xylitol is a sweetener known as a “sugar alcohol” (or polyol). Sugar alcohols are neither sugars nor alcohols − they are carbohydrates (with structures that happen to resemble sugar and alcohol). Xylitol is extracted from corn or birch cellulose. Unlike sugar, Xylitol is slowly absorbed, does not cause a rapid blood sugar increase, and does not require an immediate insulin response from the body to be metabolized. Moreover, many studies have shown that it actually helps prevent dental cavities, ear infections, and some evidence suggests that it helps prevent gum disease because Xylitol is anti-bacterial. However, Xylitol does have some potential health side effects (most notably gastrointestinal issues) and should be used with caution.
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Whether you have a toddler or a teen, here are five of the best strategies to improve nutrition and encourage smart eating habits:
Have regular family meals.
Serve a variety of healthy foods and snacks.
Be a role model by eating healthy yourself.
Avoid battles over food.
Involve kids in the process.
Sure, eating well can be hard — family schedules are hectic and grab-and-go convenience food is readily available. But our tips can help make all five strategies part of your busy household.
Family Meals
Family meals are a comforting ritual for both parents and kids. Children like the predictability of family meals and parents get a chance to catch up with their kids. Kids who take part in regular family meals are also:
more likely to eat fruits, vegetables, and grains
less likely to snack on unhealthy foods
less likely to smoke, use marijuana, or drink alcohol
Also, family meals are a chance for parents to introduce kids to new foods and to be role models for healthy eating.
Teens may turn up their noses at the prospect of a family meal — not surprising because they’re busy and want to be more independent. Yet studies find that teens still want their parents’ advice and counsel, so use mealtime as a chance to reconnect.
You might also try these tips:
Let kids invite a friend to dinner.
Involve your child in meal planning and preparation.
Keep mealtime calm and friendly — no lectures or arguing.
What counts as a family meal? Whenever you and your family eat together — whether it’s takeout food or a home-cooked meal with all the trimmings. Strive for nutritious food and a time when everyone can be there. This may mean eating dinner a little later to accommodate a teen who’s at sports practice. It also can mean setting aside time on the weekends when it may be more convenient to gather as a group, such as for Sunday brunch.
Stock Up on Healthy Foods
Kids, especially younger ones, will eat mostly what’s available at home. That’s why it’s important to control the supply lines — the foods that you serve for meals and have on hand for snacks.
Follow these basic guidelines:
Work fruits and vegetables into the daily routine, aiming for the goal of at least five servings a day. Be sure you serve fruit or vegetables at every meal.
Make it easy for kids to choose healthy snacks by keeping fruits and vegetables on hand and ready to eat. Other good snacks include yogurt, peanut butter and celery, or whole-grain crackers and cheese.
Serve lean meats and other good sources of protein, such as fish, eggs, beans, and nuts.
Choose whole-grain breads and cereals so kids get more fiber.
Choose healthier cooking methods, such as broiling, grilling, roasting, and steaming.
Limit fast food and low-nutrient snacks, such as chips and candy. But don’t completely ban favorite snacks from your home. Instead, make them “once-in-a-while” foods, so kids don’t feel deprived.
Limit sugary drinks, such as soda and fruit-flavored drinks. Serve water and low-fat milk instead.
Be a Role Model
The best way for you to encourage healthy eating is to eat well yourself. Kids will follow the lead of the adults they see every day. By eating fruits and vegetables and not overindulging in the less nutritious stuff, you’ll be sending the right message.
Another way to be a good role model is to serve appropriate portions and not overeat. Talk about your feelings of fullness, especially with younger children. You might say, “This is delicious, but I’m full, so I’m going to stop eating.” Similarly, parents who are always dieting or complaining about their bodies may foster these same negative feelings in their kids. Try to keep a positive approach about food.
Don’t Battle Over Food
It’s easy for food to become a source of conflict. Well-intentioned parents might find themselves bargaining or bribing kids so they eat the healthy food in front of them. A better strategy is to give kids some control, but to also limit the kind of foods available at home.
Kids should decide if they’re hungry, what they will eat from the foods served, and when they’re full. Parents control which foods are available to their kids, both at mealtime and between meals. Here are some guidelines to follow:
Establish a predictable schedule of meals and snacks. It’s OK to choose not to eat when both parents and kids know when to expect the next meal or snack.
Don’t force kids to clean their plates. Doing so teaches kids to override feelings of fullness.
Don’t bribe or reward kids with food. Avoid using dessert as the prize for eating the meal.
Don’t use food as a way of showing love. When you want to show love, give kids a hug, some of your time, or praise.
Get Kids Involved
Most kids will enjoy deciding what to make for dinner. Talk to them about making choices and planning a balanced meal. Some might even want to help shop for ingredients and prepare the meal. At the store, teach kids to check out food labels to begin understanding what to look for.
In the kitchen, select age-appropriate tasks so kids can play a part without getting injured or feeling overwhelmed. And at the end of the meal, don’t forget to praise the chef.
School lunches can be another learning lesson for kids. More important, if you can get them thinking about what they eat for lunch, you might be able to help them make positive changes. Brainstorm about what kinds of foods they’d like for lunch or go to the grocery store to shop together for healthy, packable foods.
There’s another important reason why kids should be involved: It can help prepare them to make good decisions on their own about the foods they want to eat. That’s not to say they’ll suddenly want a salad instead of french fries, but the mealtime habits you help create now can lead to a lifetime of healthier choices.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
Written for The truth about Cancer, visit HERE[/vc_column_text][ultimate_spacer height=”20″][vc_column_text]Young men and women who are just starting out in life shouldn’t have to worry about something like cancer. The fact that there even needs to be a national awareness week for young adult cancer saddens me. But the facts don’t lie: cancer is on the rise when it comes to people under 50.
Even though currently only about 4% of all cancer diagnoses in the United States are of young people, that number is set to rise drastically in the coming years if nothing changes.
How can we stop the travesty of cancer from happening to the next generation of our youth?
Here are some cancer statistics that may surprise you:
More than 60,000 American 20 and 30-something’s are currently diagnosed with cancer each year
Cancer accounts for close to 10% of all deaths of young people in United States. It is the leading cause of death from disease for young girls
Survival rates for young people with cancer in general have not changed much in the last decade, compared to slightly higher rates of survival for people 50 and older
The number of people in this age group who will be diagnosed with colon cancer is expected to increase by 90% by 2030.
The number of young people who will be diagnosed with rectal cancer could increase by 124%, according to a recent University of Texas study
The number of young women diagnosed with breast cancer in the United States has risen steadily over the last four decades.
Aggressive forms of breast cancer are on the rise for young women in other countries as well. A 2007 study of Swiss women ages 25-39 saw an increase of close to 50% just in the years 2002-2004 alone
Nearly two out of three cases of thyroid cancer are found in individuals under the age of 50, according to the American Cancer Society
As a Young Adult: 10 Things You Can Do To Prevent Cancer NOW
It is no surprise that rates for diseases such as breast, thyroid, and colon cancer are on the rise in young people. Like the population at large, lifestyle, eating habits, and environmental toxins are the common sense cancer culprits when it comes to young people.
People it their 20s and 30s, however, have some added hurdles to jump over. Heavy social stigma around the disease can come not just from peers; many conventional doctors still don’t take the possibility of cancer seriously for their younger patients. Couple this bias with the fact that individuals ages 20-40 are the least insured segment of the population, and many easily-reversible pre-cancerous conditions may go unnoticed until it’s too late.
If you are young and you are concerned about cancer, or if you are the concerned parent of a young adult, there are things you can do RIGHT NOW to keep healthy and cancer-free. Besides safe, very early detection, consider the following:
If you smoke, stop! In addition to lung cancer, smoking increases your risk of multiple cancers including cancers of the esophagus, larynx, mouth, throat, kidney, bladder, liver, pancreas, stomach, cervix, colon and rectum, and myeloid leukemia.
If you drink more than 3 or more alcoholic beverages a week, cut back. A study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that women who have 3 drinks per week have a 15% higher risk of breast cancer. The study also found that teenage girls who drink 3-5 alcoholic beverages per week have a greater risk of developing benign breast lumps which can turn into cancer later in life. Alcohol consumption increases the risk of mouth, throat, esophagus, liver, and colon cancer in men, including young men.
If you eat at fast food joints, start to wean yourself off. Processed foods contain trans-fats and high sugar and carbohydrate loads that can lead to cancer, along with clogged arteries and a host of other disease conditions. Not convinced? Watch the movie Supersize Me with independent filmmaker Morgan Spurlock. You will never touch a McDonald’s French fry again! On that note, did you know that there are actually 19 ingredients in a McD’s french fry? One of them is Dimethylpolysiloxane, also known as Silly Putty, an anti-foaming agent used mostly for silicone sealants and caulking.
Drink lots of fresh, pure water. Water is the best detoxifier. Also, choose a BPA-free plastic or glass container for your liquids and check the source of your drinking water. If you are drinking straight from the tap (or you have a simple under-the-sink filter), chances are you are taking in fluoride with each gulp. Fluoride has been added to most U.S. municipal water supplies since the 1960s and has been linked to neurological damage and hypothyroidism. Thyroid imbalance can develop into thyroid cancer if left unchecked. Reverse osmosis filtration is your best bet when it comes to filters.
Throw away your microwave oven now! Microwaving is a source of radiation and radiation exposure causes cancer. If you do decide to use a microwave, NEVER heat things up in it that are surrounded by plastic or Styrofoam. If you do, you will be eating a toxic soup, not leftover pizza.
If you eat meat, switch to those that have no hormones and no antibiotics. Eat only grass-fed, organic, and hormone-free. Cut back on your intake of pork as well, which tends to come with more toxin and parasitic build-up than other meat proteins do.
Use organic body care products and household cleaners. Avoid products that contain chemicals like formaldehyde, a known carcinogen.
Ladies – NEVER carry your cellphone in your bra. Gents – get your phone out of your pocket. When you talk on the phone, use the speaker function. Turn off your cell phone when you’re not using it. Also, don’t put your laptop or tablet on your lap when you are working online. EMF pollution (radiation) is real and it can cause cancer.
Include some cancer-fighting foods in your diet every day. These include broccoli, flax, green, leafy veggies and omega-3 fatty acids which can be found in fresh, organic cold water fish or as a supplement. Also consider getting your vitamin D and iodine levels checked. Iodine can combat the effects of fluoride-overload mentioned earlier and helps to regulate both endocrine and reproductive system hormone levels. Vitamin D deficiency has been linked to not only cancer, but also diabetes, osteoporosis, autoimmune conditions, and autism.
Finally, don’t stress out! Nothing is that important that you have to put your health at risk over it. And stress can be a killer that can lead to cancer. Instead, when you are feeling overwhelmed, take some deep, slow breaths, walk in nature, meditate, write in a journal, or do something creative that will help you nourish yourself, detox, de-stress, and feel vibrant every day!
Stay informed !!!
Article Summary
Currently, only about 4% of all cancer diagnoses in the United States are of young people. However that number is set to rise drastically in the coming years if nothing changes.
It’s no surprise that rates for diseases such as breast, thyroid, and colon cancer are on the rise in young people. Like the population at large, lifestyle, eating habits, and environmental toxins are the common cancer culprits when it comes to young people.
Young adults are the least insured and doctors may not take signs and symptoms seriously. As a result, many easily-reversible pre-cancerous conditions may go unnoticed until it’s too late.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
The New The New Dare to Discipline[/vc_column_text][ultimate_spacer height=”20″][vc_column_text]Question: What is your opinion of the juvenile courts? Do they reward good behavior and extinguish bad? Are they efficient in discouraging delinquency?
Answer: Not generally, but the blame is difficult to locate. I served for three years on President Ronald Reagan’s National Advisory Commission to the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention. It was a fascinating, although occasionally discouraging assignment. I observed that the courts build delinquents in some cases as systematically as if they were placing stone on stone.
This happened with a ninth grader I knew who had broken every rule he could violate, just to demonstrate the toothlessness of the law. Craig would brag to his friends before committing an illegal act, and then laugh when he was not punished. In a matter of two years’ time, he had stolen two cars and one motorcycle, had run away from home twice, was suspended from school three times, and was arrested once as a peeping Tom. I watched him march off to court repeatedly where he was released after receiving another worn-out lecture from the judge.
Finally, Craig was sent to a camp for delinquent boys where he wrote me a letter saying how he regretted the mess he’d made of his life. He was anxious to get home and take advantage of his educational opportunity. I think Craig wanted to know how far he could push “John Law.” As soon as he got the answer, he no longer wanted to fight. He should have been punished the first time he was arrested.
Shortly after hearing from Craig, I talked to a well-known judge about the obvious leniency of the courts. I asked him why juvenile authorities are so reluctant to take action against a defiant teenager, even though he may be begging for punishment. The judge cited two reasons for the attitudes of his colleagues:
(1) There aren’t enough correctional facilities available for boys like Craig. The work camps must be reserved for the greatest troublemakers.
(2) It is difficult for judges to get excited about milder forms of delinquency when they have been dealing with more serious cases involving murder, rape, and robbery. It is unfortunate that the judges are limited in this fashion. A teenager’s first encounter with the law should be so painful that he would not want to make the same mistake again, but our legal apparatus is not designed to accomplish that objective.
The juvenile courts occasionally commit the opposite error of dealing too harshly with a teenager. Such had been the case with Linda, a girl I met late one rainy afternoon. I was working on a report at my desk when I suddenly realized I was not
alone. I looked up to see a barefoot, rain-soaked girl in my doorway. She was a pretty adolescent of about fifteen years.
“You can call the police now,” she instructed me.
“Why would I want to call the police?” I asked.
“Because I have run away from ———.” (She named a nearby detention home for delinquent girls.) She said she’d spent the day hiding from the authorities.
She told me her name was Linda, and I asked her to sit down and tell me why she had run away. She started at the beginning, and I later verified the facts to be true. Her mother had been a prostitute who gave no supervision or guidance to her daughter. Linda was even allowed to remain in the bedroom while her mother entertained men. The child was eventually taken away from her mother and made a ward of the court. She was placed in a home for young victims where there was not enough love to go around. Her mother came to see her for a few years, but then ignored her completely.
Linda was so starved for love that she ran away to find her mother. She was immediately returned to the home. A year later she tried to escape again, with the same result. Linda continued to run away, each time becoming more sophisticated in evading the police. The year before my introduction to this girl, she had vanished again, this time being picked up by several boys. They lived together for two weeks and were involved in several misdemeanors and various sexual escapades during that period.
Linda was subsequently arrested and brought before the juvenile court as a delinquent. She was sentenced to the detention center for delinquent girls, surrounded by ten-foot chain link fences. The court considered her to be an unmanageable, incorrigible adolescent, yet this was wrong. Linda was a lonely, love-starved girl who had been cheated by the circumstances of life. She needed someone to care—not someone to punish. Perhaps the judge was too busy to study her background; perhaps he had no alternative facility for Linda. Either way, the needs of this wispy girl remained unmet at this critical time of her life.
Juvenile justice must be designed to be lenient with the child who has been hurt, like Linda, and to sting the child who has challenged authority, like Craig. It is sometimes difficult to recognize the difference.[/vc_column_text][ultimate_spacer height=”20″][dt_default_button link=”url:http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dobsonlibrary.com%2Fresource%2Farticle%2F19b0f619-a013-4016-a332-7410bf18d600||target:%20_blank|” size=”big”]DOBSONLIBRAY.COM[/dt_default_button][/vc_column][/vc_row]
Straight Talk To Men [/vc_column_text][ultimate_spacer height=”20″][vc_column_text]Question: My wife and I are extremely busy during this period of our lives. My job takes me on the road several days a week, and my wife has become very successful as a real estate agent. Quite honestly, we are not able to spend much time with our three children, but we give them our undivided attention when we are together. My wife and I wish we had more family time, but we take comfort in knowing that it’s not the quantity of time between parents and child that really matters; it’s the quality of time that makes the difference. Would you agree with that statement?
Answer: Permit me to respond to your question by a back-door approach which may seem irrelevant, at first. As a person who earns part of his living by use of the King’s English, I often find myself examining the validity of folk wisdom and cliches which have been accepted prima facie within our culture. While discussing the legal ramifications of pornography with a friend, for example, he confidently uttered that familiar phrase, “Well, you can’t legislate morality, you know.” I nodded in agreement, but later asked myself, “Why not?”
It is immoral to kill, rape, slander, defraud, and plunder, yet we have managed to legislate against these behaviors, haven’t we? Is not all criminal law based on the prohibition of certain inherently evil acts? Indeed, we would be in a mess if our lawmakers truly believed, “You can’t legislate morality, you know.”
Returning to the question of quantity versus quality in parent child relationships, we confront yet another widely quoted cliche that is equally porous. Without intending disrespect for the father who asked the above question, this phrase is bandied about by overcommitted and harassed parents who feel guilty about the lack of time they spend with their children. Their boys and girls are parked at child care centers during the day and with baby sitters at night, leaving little time for traditional parenting activities. And to handle the discomfort of neglecting their children, Mom and Dad cling to a catch-phrase that makes it seem so healthy and proper: “Well, you know, it’s not he quantity of time that matters, it’s the quality of you togetherness that counts.”
There is a grain of truth in most popular notions, and this one is no exception. We can all agree that there is no benefit in being with our children seven days a week if we are angry, oppressive, unnurturing and capricious with them. But from that point forward, the quantity versus quality issue runs aground. Simply stated, that dichotomy will not be tolerated in any other area of our lives; why do we apply it only to children? Let me illustrate.
Let’s suppose you are very hungry, having eaten nothing all day. You select the best restaurant in your city and ask the waiter for the finest steak on his menu. He replies that the filet mignon is the house favorite, and you order it charcoal-broiled, medium rare. The waiter returns twenty minutes later with the fare and sets it before you. There in the center of a large plate is a lonely piece of meat, one inch square, flanked by a single bit of potato.
You complain vigorously to the waiter. “Is this what you call a steak dinner?”
He then replies, “Sir, how can you criticize us before you taste that meat? I have brought you one square inch of the finest steak money can buy. It is cooked to perfection, salted with care, and served while hot. In fact, I doubt if you could get a better piece of meat anywhere in the city. I’ll admit that the serving is small, but after all, sir, everyone knows that it isn’t the quantity that matters; it’s the quality that counts in steak dinner.”
“Nonsense!” you reply, and I certainly agree. You see, the subtlety of this simple phrase is that it pits two necessary virtues in opposition to one another and invites us to choose between them. If quantity and quality are worthwhile ingredients in family relationships, then why not give our kids both? It is insufficient to toss our “hungry” children an occasional bit of steak, even it if is prime, corn-fed filet mignon.
My concern is that the quantity versus quality cliche has become, perhaps, a rationalization for giving our kids neither!
“Fathers and Sons”[/vc_column_text][ultimate_spacer height=”20″][vc_column_text]
Listen HERE to Dr. Clinton interview Kirk Cameron on his radio program Life, Love and Family With Dr. Tim Clinton.
4 Steps for Transitioning Boys into Men (Cameron & Molitor, 2012):
Have a Plan—little ever gets accomplished without a well-devised plan. Think about the qualities you’d like to see in your son as he grows. Write a list of the attributes that you think define successful young men. List the spiritual, emotional, physical, vocational, social, and financial qualities you hope to see in your son. Once you’ve identified these, create a plan to impart these to him.
Bless Your Son—a blessing is passed on when a respected elder speaks words of encouragement and affirmation to any young person. Children are constantly bombarded with messages—subtle and otherwise—that they just don’t measure up. God will use your words of blessing to neutralize these negative messages and instill hope to your son.
Mentor Your Son—boys must grow up around positive male role models so that they can observe what it means to be a man. Successful mentoring occurs when a close relationship is combined with well-conceived lesson plans. When you know what lessons, skills, and truths you want your son to learn, then you can intentionally look for opportunities to teach those things.
Rite of Passage Ceremony—plan a celebration, a marked time, when your son is received and declared a man. From this point forward, your son will be accepted and embraced by you, your family, and friends as a man. Invite other godly men and ask them to pray over your son, write him letters to impart wisdom, and bring symbolic gifts to signify his entry into manhood. Let this be a time to celebrate your son’s life and the man that he is becoming!
The Importance of Fathers:
Kids with absentee fathers are more likely to drop out of school, be abused, be obese, and lack feelings of security (The Father Factor, 2013).
Almost 75 percent of children living in fatherless homes will experience poverty and are 10 times as likely to experience extreme poverty (Clinton & Trent, 2009).
The deterioration of fatherhood in America is considered our most serious social ill. Nearly 40 percent of children fall asleep in homes where their father is not present.
The National Commission on Children found that nearly half of all children in disrupted families have not seen their fathers at all in the past year.
Fatherlessness is associated with crime, suicide, teenage pregnancy, drug and alcohol abuse, and incarceration.
Kids with present fathers perform better academically, achieve greater cognitive development, experience less anxiety, and have stronger feelings of identity.
Quotes:
“One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters.”—George Herbert
“A male is born, but a man is made.”—Unknown
“There is no man living that cannot do more than he thinks he can.”—Henry Ford
“If I’m pointing him to heaven with my words, but leading him to hell with my life I have blown it.”—Kirk Cameron
“If you don’t know where you are going, the road will take you there.”—Unknown
“It’s never too late to become a great father.”—Tim Clinton
“What we do in life echoes in eternity.”—Maximus Decimus Meridius, inGladiator
“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”—George Eliot
“Being a father means being a mentor.”—Unknown
“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”—Edmund Burke
“Adversity toughens manhood, and the characteristic of the good of the great man is not that he has been exempt from the evils of life, but that he has surmounted them.”—Patrick Henry
“A real man is one who rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects the greater reward, God’s reward.”—Robert Lewis
“Give me one hundred men who fear nothing but sin and desire nothing but God, and I care not whether they be clergymen or laymen, they alone will shake the gates of hell and set up the kingdom of heaven upon the earth.”—John Wesley
Key Thoughts:
There are certain gifts that only fathers can give their children.
Dad’s often do not give what they did not get from their dads.
Your responsibility as a father is to train up the next generation. If you do not model how to be a godly man to your kids, you have neglected your greatest responsibility.
Use the examples of Jesus, Paul, and godly men in history like George Washington—those who have fought the fights and had the right perspective.
You are to love and lead with affection, tenderness, and commitment.
Surround yourself with godly men who can be an example.
Take time to delight in your children, reminding them of critical truths, of who they are, of their identity in Christ. If you children do not know who they are, they will go looking for it in a gang, a girl, a guy—somewhere or with someone who gives them the identity that they are searching for.
Mentoring, teaching, and training by a trusted adult are vital for successful development. In the absence of positive adult role models, young males will find their own role models or mentors. The absence of positive role models creates a void in a young man, one that is quickly filled by someone much less qualified (Cameron & Molitor, 2012).
Young boys lacking discernment are often attracted to external (and false) signs of maturity.
Verses:
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”—Ephesians 6:4
“But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.”—James 3:8-10
“He will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of their children to their fathers, so that I will not come and smite the land with a curse.”—Malachi 4:6
“Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”—Proverbs 27:17
“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.”—Ephesians 4:29
“Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.”—1 Corinthians 16:13-14
“But flee from these things, you man of God, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness.”—1 Timothy 6:11
“When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.”—1 Corinthians 13:11
Bringing Up Your Children with Peace, Patience and Confidence
At one time or another, every mom has felt lacking in her ability as a parent. It begins with caring for your newborn. Am I doing this right? And then continues with toddler tantrums all the way through the teenage years. Am I making the right decisions? Are my kids going to turn out all right? When they make mistakes, will they know that God is on their side? Even when our children are grown-ups, they’ll forever be our children.
There are awesome responsibilities that come with being a parent, and while many men are committed to their families and deeply involved in their children’s lives, mothers tend to be the primary nurturers.
I have met young moms who feel they are not what they should be unless they can juggle marriage, parenting, home-making, and a career all at the same time.
Sometimes messy and difficult family situations like divorce, alcoholism, abuse, or other problems make it even harder to persevere with a positive, peaceful attitude.
Then there’s the worry that your children may not choose to pursue a personal relationship with God or walk through life with Him.
If you feel like your joy in motherhood is being overshadowed by family challenges or a swirling sense of self-doubt, I want to help you claim the confidence you need to enjoy the journey of motherhood.
I’m not talking about confidence in your own abilities; I am talking about having confidence in God’s ability to help you and guide you each step of the way. He intends for motherhood to be a joyful experience, and I want to help you learn how to lean confidently on Him.
One thing God doesn’t want you to do is worry. Some people think if they aren’t worrying about their children, they’re not good parents. However, the Bible warns us not to worry because it does us no good.
Matthew 6:27 (AMPC) says, And who of you by worrying and being anxious can add one unit of measure (cubit) to his stature or to the span of his life?
Like most parents, Dave and I had some kind of issue with each of our children. And I wasted a lot of time worrying while they were growing up.Two of our children struggled getting through school, one was very messy, and another was an extreme perfectionist and put tremendous pressure on herself. The good news is they all made it and are doing fine.
Some of them took a little detour and made some bad choices, but they learned from them and came full circle back to what they were taught.
God’s Word states that if we train our children in the way they should go, when they are old they will not depart from it (see Proverbs 22:6). If you are concerned about your children, just cling to that promise. Pray for their needs, and then cast your care on God.
Instead of feeling the pressure of worldly expectations, do the best job you can to raise your children according to godly principles and leave the rest up to God.
Why are Single Fathers So Important to the Church?
According to the Pew Research Center, there were approximately 300,000 single father households in 1960; today there are around 2.6 million. Still, this only accounts for 17% of all custodial parents in single parent homes. If we really want to broaden the spectrum, we can make a strong case that a “single father” is any single man who is involved or wants to be involved in his child’s life. Case in point: in our latest YouTube video you may notice none of the dads in the video were ever married and none are the custodial parent. But that doesn’t rule them out as the father, does it? Not at all! Without taking away from the amazing men who are already parenting as a one-man team, this approach greatly expands the mission field and our ability to relate with more dads, whether or not he is the custodial parent.
Research around the globe is consistent: when fathers are involved in the lives of their children (full or part-time), those children perform significantly better overall cognitively, emotionally, socially, and academically than those without involved dads. As we here at A Father’s Walk have said time and time again: If we want to stop the bleeding in this nation when it comes to crime, teen pregnancy and suicide, substance abuse, divorce, and so on…then we MUST get to the dads!
Over the years our small group has seen men who have risen above and beyond as fathers despite overwhelming obstacles: everything from terminal diseases to felonies. Now, they are thriving as parents and spiritual leaders. There is a story of one single dad who joined the group before he even became a father, because he wanted to be prepared when his daughter was born! Today, that dad is just like a sponge, soaking up every bit of information he can on how to grow as a man and as a father. Others have voluntarily checked themselves into rehab to help overcome addictions, continued to support their children’s relationship with their mom (despite her being the one to leave the family), and so on. Simply put, these single dads are doing what is necessary for the overall benefit of their families. Oh, if only ALL dads could rise like some of these men have!
It is with great encouragement that we can recognize and celebrate such men. Jesus tells us in John 15:13 that “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends” (NASB). In a nation that is still experiencing the heartache and devastation of fatherlessness, we can rejoice and praise the Lord for fathers who do lay down their lives for their children’s sake. Single parenthood is still on the rise, but there is hope ahead. Organizations, churches, neighborhoods across the nation (and even the media) are really beginning to shine a positive light on fatherhood. The Fatherhood CoMission (which includes A Father’s Walk) has a new campaign entitled Honor Your Father. Their website has plenty of tremendous resources to assist all of us to honor our own dads, honor fatherhood, and to grow as fathers ourselves.
The Bible tells us in Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (NASB). God has put a very specific admonishment on dads as the spiritual leaders of their families. Single fathers are no exception to this and our children need this sort of godly influence like never before. Today, we encourage you to celebrate the men who are answering the Lord’s call to raise their children in Christ no matter what type of situation they may be in. Even if that isn’t immediately evident in the life of a single dad you may know, now is a great opportunity to introduce the saving grace of Jesus into his life. Remember, look for the potential, not the flaws. When we begin to view single fathers as the priceless investments that they are, we catch another glimpse of how God works through the most difficult of circumstances to fulfill some of his greatest testimonies.
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